Derek's Funeral

So today is Derek's funeral. 

Last night Jack asked for me and him to go to the gym and leave the house around 6.45am - I was up bright and early and sat downstairs watching the last episodes of Dexter Season 2 when he phoned me at 7.00am - "where are you?" he asked - "downstairs waiting for you since 6.30am!" - he didn't believe he at first - he'd overslept.

Still, we went anyway and got a decent hour done - quite enjoyed it, I really need to get up there more. He had a sauna and dragged out his time there whilst I waited for him....again!

I had the day off from work today, I still checked emails but we're on top of things at the minute so it's all good and running the Inbox these days is manageable.

Back home we got things sorted and then Jack drove me to Headington so I could drop off the flowers at the Funeral directors and then we went to Summertown because the photos that we'd ordered for the wake hadn't arrived so Tash ordered some instant ones from Boots. I was impressed with that - she'd uploaded and ordered them and 20-30mins later I went to the machine, scanned the QR code and the photos all printed, very good service. £11.00 for 20 - so not too desperate.

Back home Lewis arrived and then we all got ourselves sorted and went and got Mum. Lewis and her family (minus Trevor) were all there and we chatted before jumping in the cars and heading for the Crematorium. It was interesting, and nice, seeing who arrived and thankfully there was a decent number of people - the 30-odd that Mum hoped would be the numbers - perhaps just a bit more than that actually. 

There were people from her work and neighbours and friends and then some of ours were there - Wayne, Zoe, Little and Big Liams and Sharon. 

We waiting in the warm room until Chanelle (funeral director) called us in and us 6 pall bearers waited outside until the right time to carry him in. Whilst we were waiting three people arrived who I didn't recognise and after being in the chapel for about 2 mins came out again - they'd arrived at the wrong crematorium!! "OMG, it's like Only Fools and Horses" I heard the lady say - of course I found the funny side to it and offered for them to stay anyway!

It was now time to carry Derek's coffin in which was for me, Jack, Lewis, Simon, Peter and Luke and we did okay - but it was heavy. As I turned to return to my seat I was greeted with Tash and Charlotte crying so I had to look the other way knowing that I had my speech lined up and didn't want to get emotional reading it.

Kirsten did her bit and her introduction was good, Lewis did a reading well, and then I had to do eulogy. I did okay and just told the stories from my notes and looked up etc and enjoyed doing it to be fair. A hymn, music, Lewis doing another reading and soon it was all over with Kirsten wrapping things up. 

As we filed out to the music from the Hovis Advert we placed a single white rose on the coffin and milled around outside chatting and thanking people. After 20 mins people started to depart and go back to work or the pub (Vic and Danny's Abingdon Arms) - we thanked Kirsten and Chanelle and they were complimentary to us and gave mum a photo and that was it - all very well done.

We made our way to the pub and had a back room all to ourselves and we had drinks and food and caught up - it was a really nice afternoon and people stayed a long time so that was fantastic. Really enjoyable afternoon and a great send off for Derek. 

Louise and her kids decided they wanted to go home and not back to Mum's - bit odd that they don't put themselves out more for Mum, but there you go. We stayed on a bit later and then went back to Norton Close and had some food and more chatting. Mum was tired and had a headache by now so we made a move to leave her to it and she was fine with that.

Back home we all went to bed and that was the day over.

I was quite pleased with Jack as on the way home he said he liked my writing and speaking style and and I should be writing blogs - "it's very distinct". That was a nice compliment.

A long day but it was "enjoyable" and went really well. Bless Derek, he was a part of our lives and in some ways wasn't - he was very withdrawn from things but was a constant for Mum. 

She did really well today - just need to keep her active going forwards now because she's not going to be visiting the home now and with the funeral done all the planning that was involved is also free time that she now has.